the tremors are more insistent and they feel like a bruise. i still can tell the difference between the noises at the ems and fire departments don’t come from the tv. i still have to pay attention not to wander off.

all the mistakes i make are the ones i warn my mother about. like miscounting my meds, using sharp knives, cleaning the dishes and eating on time.

i catch myself treating her like i’m being treated, making decisions for her and applying them. she’s 30 minutes too late, refuses to make decisions, lingers a little too long over events.

as ye judge so shall ye be judged…

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